A lot of people fear saying NO because as human beings we naturally want to be liked & accepted.
But there comes a point in time where people worry too much about what others think. They think they be may be outed on social media. They may get attacked, trolled or criticised.
I thank my critics, trolls & haters as they give me fuel, keep me on my toes; ever seeking improvement, always vigilant, at times humble & always agile. You spur me on to do, be, have & give more, & you are more poetic than you know. You help me with my reach & your comments help the algorithms push my posts wider. You spark debates, give me good ideas & spread my message to more people. Someone has to love you & your work, so let that be me.
So, here are my top ways to say NO to things & people that aren’t important to you:
1. Give YOURSELF permission to ignore or say no firmly/fairly
As simple as it sounds. Just learn to say NO. Don’t beat around the bush or offer weak excuses. Sometimes the less said the better. Of course, still be assertive and courteous whoever possible.
2. Create videos for the common Qs you get & send them a link
For example my FAQ page here. I get asked the same questions every day and rather than ignore them or respond to them individually I have them check out the FAQ page on my website. Less time repeating yourself. More time to get on with the job at hand.
3. Have clear Key Result Area (KRA) & Income Generating Tasks (IGT),
K.ey R.esult A.reas are the highest value areas you focus on to achieve your vision. 3-7 areas to spend your time to make the maximum difference to your team, company and legacy.
I.ncome G.enerating T.asks are the highest value to you [or your company] tasks that align with your KRA’s, to maximise revenue per hour, minute and second. These are the tasks that bring the highest, leveraged results in the optimum amount of time, bringing in the maximum benefit and revenue without wastage.
There are 3 types of work/business related tasks:
1. Impact tasks (Money tomorrow)
2. Income tasks (Money today)
3. Admin tasks (Cost money to outsource but even MORE to do yourself)
Your goal: reduce & outsource your admin tasks down to 10% of your time
Spend 90% of your time on impact & income tasks
4. …be so busy on your KRAs & IGTs that you just don’t have time
Overwhelm and procrastination in your to do list comes from lack of focus on IGT’s and going equal importance to all tasks or lacking order of IGT priority. If you get stuck or dragged into micro day-to-day tasks check them against your KRA’s to remove all distractions and low level tasks. If you have staff you must create these and have them use their KRA’s to direct their focus too.
5. Have a gatekeeper/PA who manages all requests for you
This is self explanatory really. If you let people take all your time up, they will. There are of course many people who will consume all your time. But you will have taught them to. So educate people how much access they can have to you, and don’t blame them if they take it. Be very clear how they can contact you and what your ’terms’ of your time are, like specific times or platforms to communicate with you.
6. Know you can’t please everyone, ever, so stop trying
Each time things don’t go your way, or you make a mistake, try not to be too hard on yourself. The world and/or critics will do a good enough job of challenging you, so stop beating yourself up. Learn to brush-off rejection and move on. Remember you are NOT your past mistakes and you are not a failure. You make mistakes and sometimes might fail.
There is a difference. You don’t need to carry around mistakes from yesterday as if they define us. Whatever you’ve done, it’s over. It doesn’t have to brand you, particularly not if you’re making the conscious choice to do things differently now.