People don’t stand against you because they hate you.
People stand against you because they stand for something else.
Your unique values & vision have a polarised opposite, and somewhere on the planet someone has almost the exact opposite beliefs, rejection complex, values & view of the world.
I believe that the world is a mirror. The energy, information, conversation and the marketing that you put out, will reflect directly back as a mirror to you. If criticise others, others will criticise you. If you lash out to others, others will lash out at you, and the world will be a mirror. Whereas, if you focus on your own business, your own brand, your own mission, and your own message, and you put that out to the world, you’re going to attract the people that are attracted to that message.
If you worry too much about what others think of you, you are minimising your vision & focus, and diluting the very thing that inspires you the most. If you constantly subordinate your inspired plan to reduce conflict or negativity, you end up serving someone else’s plan.
Someone else’s opinion of you, your actions or your vision is simply a projected perception filtered through their own world view. It makes them no more or less right than you, and their vocalised opposition & rejection complex of you is nothing about you but a reflection of their highest values & beliefs.
Accept the challengers as much as the supporters.
Changing strategy or vocation won’t make them go away, you’ll just attract different people/forms of criticism & ridicule somewhere else.
Be thankful for it/them as much as your raving fans, be open to learn from challenge as well as support, be very clear on your vision & never stop doing what’s most important to you, no matter what others say.
I’m a believer that criticism ideally in the form of critical feedback is vital for growth. What I am not saying, is, always be nice. Always treat others as how you would want to be treated. I think that is a nice way to live your life. But this is not the message.
Rejection isn’t fun.
Nobody likes to feel rejected and I suspect that everyone feels that they’re the only one who knows and understands the pain of being rejected. I’d argue that it affects to EVERYONE, certainly everyone that I’ve met, regardless of their status or their perceived level of success in life.
All rejection really is, is feedback. Your emotions are the inherent feedback mechanism that evolution has equipped you with to survive, to weather adversity and danger and to react and respond to your environment in pursuit of security.
Experiencing guilt, shame, loneliness, embarrassment or feeling ostracised are all emotional reactions to rejection. The rejection itself is feedback upon your actions; maybe your timing was wrong, your approach too aggressive or your product simply not ready for the market. It’s down to you to shape how you take that feedback and how you respond to the emotions that it evokes to make it serve you and to help you improve and grow.
Don’t try and avoid rejection. Seeking safety and security may feel comfortable, but it will likely also limit the successes that you experience in life. Instead, expect rejection and use it as a trigger for learning from the feedback it provides. The reward that is brought through learning and evolving may be ever-greater rejection as your successes emerge. It’s part of growth and progress and you should see rejection as a gift in that sense, not something that must be avoided.
There are so many people out there who are letting their past damage their present and future. When you feel those strong emotions arising within you, recognise them for what they are; triggers from events in your past. Try and maintain perspective and self-control and don’t resort to anger or a rant on social media to feel better. Don’t give up either!
I think it’s really important to have the skills to be able to reinvent yourself, before someone comes and pulls a rug of your life under you financially, emotionally, in a relationship, et cetera. So that you’re not blindsided. And it doesn’t send you into feeling out of control, or even worse into kind of maybe a more depressive state, or just having a bit of a loss of identity and direction of your business and personal life.
While you may struggle with rejection, others find it easy – learn from them
As with all skills and traits in life, there are those who find it difficult and others who find it easy. The same is true for rejection! There are many people out there who have learned to embrace, appreciate and learn from the negative feedback and rejection they receive. You can seek them out and learn from them, to become better by adopting the same tactics and strategies as they have.